100 Years Young

Mark Uncategorised 7 Comments

The boys Great Grandma turned 100 this week. 100!

The secret to her longevity? No idea, she doesn’t speak a word of English.

I’m hoping it’s watching Dallas box-sets, reruns of Jamie Oliver and her afternoon naps, in which case I’d better start planning for my extended retirement because that’s not too far removed from my lifestyle now.

I suspect it’s more likely to be her healthy living, hard work, regular exercise and a stubbornness to always do things her own way, and who can blame her when she’s chalked up a century of ‘I told you so’s!’

(Happy Birthday Nanny!)

She’s lived a fascinating life.… read the full post.

Community Partner Award – Pride of Britain

Mark Uncategorised 2 Comments

I didn’t write about the horrific attack on the Manchester Arena at the time. I tried, on numerous occasions, but everything I put down on paper seemed desperately inadequate, blurred further by a myriad of emotions that fluctuated between anger, despair, defiance and sorrow.

This was my city. My streets. My community. It felt personal.

But over the following days and weeks, one emotion proved stronger than all before it.… read the full post.

Rules of the Pool

Mark Parenting 6 Comments

Everyone knows the rules of the pool.

No running, ducking, bombing or heavy petting.

The latter might seem laughable to any younger readers, but before Easyjet flew you to Magaluf for a sleazy weekend, swimming pools were a hotbed of inappropriateness. A heady mix of plastic palm trees, wave machines, speedo’s and verruca socks.

By the mid-eighties, poolside petting had become an epidemic of amorousness.… read the full post.

We Have an Allotment

Mark Uncategorised 1 Comment

We have an allotment.

A sentence that may come as a surprise to those who know me but less so when I explain how it came about.

You see, when it comes to buying presents I often struggle for inspiration. Especially for those special occasions that creep up on you when you least expect them. Like Christmas.

My usual coping mechanism involves deep breaths and Amazon vouchers, but occasionally the mist of panic clears, through which emerges a sign.… read the full post.

Better Call Sonny

Mark Parenting, Popular 6 Comments

Had an accident in the playground that wasn’t your fault? Better call Sonny.

If it was your fault, say nothing and call him anyway.

This is a conversation we had a few days ago…

Sonny: “Have I got PPI?”

Me: “No”

Sonny: “You sure?”

Me: “Yep.”

Sonny: “… think I might have.”

Me: “Pretty sure you’ve not.”

Sonny: “…… might put a claim in anyway.”

WTF?… read the full post.