For us Northerners, Blackpool illuminations is a rite of passage. It's a coming of age moment. Right up there with your first Greggs pasty, chip barms and rickets.
I'll not lie, I had high expectations. So much so I may have bigged it up a little too much.
Duinrell Family Park - Canvas Holidays
Big Shop with Little Helpers
Like Riding a Bike
Whilst on holiday in Edinburgh we met up with an old friend of Janet's for lunch.
We talk about religion quite a lot. Luca loves church buildings and mosques, Sonny is fascinated by the Hindu temple we occasionally drive past.
Despite being an Aetheist I like to think I treat them all equally and with the respect they deserve.
"Are you OK Sunshine?"
"Not bad thanks, could do without College tonight, but can't cry off again."
The question was aimed at Luca.
The reply came from a young lady stood behind me in the supermarket queue.
Seriously, who answers a stranger stood with his back to them? In fact, who answers to Sunshine over the age of three?
We've had a lovely few days in the sunshine, which coincided perfectly with Luca finally shaking off his seemingly endless list of bugs and lurgy.
Sunday was their cousin Elizabeth's birthday party with a Pirate & Princesses theme.
I've decided to embrace my inner grumpiness through a series of posts I'm calling 'the mutterings of a middle-aged man'. And before you say it, no, it wasn't always such; at least not officially.
And where better to start than this.
To celebrate World Book Day we've been recycling old books to create new stories.
In our defence of it not being outright sacrilege, they were the type of dull books you get free with a jigsaw. No worthy books were harmed in the making of our new story, I promise.
I've not blogged over the summer holidays. I'd like to say it was a self-imposed sabbatical, but that would be ignoring the hours sat sobbing in front of a blank screen calculating how many hours it was until school re-opened.
Which came first, the campsite or the amusement park?
As is often the case, my question fell on deaf ears as we arrived at the fabulous Duinrell Holiday Park in the Netherlands, courtesy of Canvas Holidays.
Father, caregiver, storyteller, teeth-brushing inspector, school-on-time deliverer, comic in residence, Mario Kart Grand Master ...
… but you don't need to ask them, because I've done it for you.
Mario and challenge in the same sentence? I didn't need asking twice.
Who knew being a full-time stay-at-home dad came with a twelve month notice period? Not Janet, that's for sure.
I've crossed an electronicals line this week. Twice. Thrice if you include my insistence on using the word electronicals (but lets not).
The first was with my phone. I was trying to take a photo of the kids but no matter how I held it I couldn't get my finger out of the shot.