For us Northerners, Blackpool illuminations is a rite of passage. It's a coming of age moment. Right up there with your first Greggs pasty, chip barms and rickets.
I'll not lie, I had high expectations. So much so I may have bigged it up a little too much.
Duinrell Family Park - Canvas Holidays
Big Shop with Little Helpers
Like Riding a Bike
I'm not a fan of snow.
It all started back when I was seven years old. My sisters and I were having a snowball fight in the street.
At the time my Auntie was visiting from America with her then partner, Chad.
Things I've learnt (and not) this week...
People who work are grumpy.
I'm not suggesting all people, but those of us at home during the day say hello when we pass in the street you know. Well, unless you live at No 42.
Every day for a year I've said hello. Nothing. Every day I swear I'll not bother tomorrow.
We've found a great new playgroup that's within walking distance; although I'm not sure we'll be going back.
For once it was Sonny who took the family shame, and Luca and I who brought it upon him.
Everything was going well until a mother made the mistake of making conversation.
Who knew being a full-time stay-at-home dad came with a twelve month notice period? Not Janet, that's for sure.
For the purposes of this post, all kids names are fictional. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental, albeit blindingly obvious to those who know them so I should probably stop right now, but ...
I have a confession to make.
I'm already judging Sonny and Luca's friends at school.
On Friday, Luca emerged excitedly from school with the class bear tucked under his arm, along with a book chronicling its previous adventures. A book that reads more like the ultimate '50 things to do before you die' than any weekend I've ever experienced.
My weekend plans were in tatters.
Me? A stay-at-home dad? Eating out?
I'm not going to be a cool dad. There, I've said it!
Maybe not news to anyone who knows me, but recently the boys had convinced me otherwise.
Sonny thinks it cool that I can remove his nose then screw it back on.
Luca finds it cool that I can juggle.
My childhood was one big game of hide and seek, or more accurately hide, jump out, and measure your success on the pitch of the ensuing scream. Even at 38 I still feel a sense of anxiety if either of my sisters are in the house and I don't know exactly where they are at any given time.
It wasn't anything George Osborne said, I'd actually expected far worse.
It wasn't even the fist pumping of Iain Duncan Smith, like a teenager who'd just groped his first boob.